Nerd Status: High

tardisity:

The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.

(via engorgio-reducio)

thegayloki:

danglingthpider:

rabioheab:

rabioheab:

i hate americans and their stupid fahrenheit temperatures

i only made this post in the hopes that someone would reblog it with the caption “don’t fahrenhate” and you’ve all disappointed me greatly

don’t be a celsiass

its too fahrenlate 

(via engorgio-reducio)

stolemyheartpt2:

peeing in the ocean is the best feeling its like im sharing a piece of myself with the world i hope my pee made it to australia i love australia 

(Source: 2cornchipsandapieceofham, via thehilariousblog)

steptoe:

We’ll we’ll we’ll if it isn’t autocorrect

(via engorgio-reducio)

kobayashimarooned:

padalackles:

dent-arthur-dent:

drarna:

i love how the two most cited love stories of all time are romeo & juliet and titanic and they both involve teenagers who knew each other for less than a week

and Leonardo DiCaprio played the male lead in both them.

And he died in both of them

and he still didn’t win an oscar

(via closedeyes-hopingforabetterlife)

ihiditinyourfood:

thorhead:

I can’t honestly be the only one who gets really disappointed if their calendar picture for the month of their birthday is rubbish, right?

i have been waiting for this post my whole life

(Source: thordoftherings, via engorgio-reducio)

degrassholes:

instead of ‘gay friends’ can we say homiesexuals 

(via resonanthazza)

mrmdprncss:

i’m always weirdly proud when my pee is clear because it’s like fuck yeah i’m so hydrated 

(via peetasgotnicebuns)

do you ever see a person you used to be friends with and you’re like “glad i got the fuck outta that one”

(Source: hitchups, via the-stylinson-couple)